Here comes X-mas dinner my Pa said The truck came rolling in Yeah we raised our pig during summer And invited all our meat eating kinds That little pig came oinking thru the truckdoor We just stood there without a clue He was running for his life like never before Then my Pa came howling too Hot Damn, shouted grandpa from the frontporch That pig is gonna outrun y'all It's been a long time since I had good pork But this one woun't be fat before fall That little pig was faster than a greaseball It turned like a spooken horse If it hadn't been for the doctor making a housecall That pig would've been shot in mid-course Doc was driving from the stateline The pig was on his way to town We heard a thump and an eerie whine Then a sizzling horrible sound We ran and thought soneone was dying In the front window we saw a pigs ass Doc was sitting there crying With our x-mas meal all covered with glass