Hey, mom and dad I'm a real dick and I hope you know that Hey, mom and dad I'm a piece of shit and I hope you know that Hey, mom and dad I'm a real bitch and I hope you know that Hey, mom and dad I'm a real Dick, dick Hey, Samuel I'm a real fuck and I hope you know that Hey, Charlie I'm a real wuss and I hope you know that Hey, Caroline I'm a real puss and I hope you know that Hey, Pierce I'm a real cock and I hope you know that Hey, Rachel I'm real sissy ass clown and I hope you know that Hey, everyone I'm a real sucker and I hope you know that Hey, extended family I suck a lot of dick Hey, everybody at school I'm a total piece of shit Hey, everyone who I didn't mention, fuck me Hey, everybody I love, fuck me, yeah