I wanna be a dog, wanna wag my tail, Chase cars and knock over garbage cans, Bite the man who brings the mail. I wanna be a dog, wanna lie on the floor, Chase squirrels and cats, get fed, get fat, Chew your shoe and bark at the door. I wanna be a dog, wanna dig big holes, Sniff trees and ground and basset hounds And pee on telephone poles. I wanna be a dog, wanna drool all around, Scratch fleas and ticks and run after sticks, I just wanna be a hound. I wanna be a dog, wanna roll in the dirt, Wanna run in the street, get mud on my feet And jump up onto your shirt. I wanna have dog breath, wake the neighbors too. I'll lick your hand, be the best friend to man; I've got nothing better to do. I wanna be a dog, I want my nose to be wet. I've got a college degree now all I wanna be Is somebody else's pet