Paperback writer, paperback writer. Dear Sir or Madam will you read my book, It took me years to write will you take a look, Based on a novel by a man named Lear, And I need a job, So I want to be a paperback writer, Paperback writer. It's a dirty story of a dirty man, And his clinging wife doesn't understand. His son is working for the Daily Mail, It's a steady job, But he wants to be a paperback writer, Paperback writer. It's a thousand pages give or take a few, I'll be writing more in a week or two, I can make it longer if you like the style, I can change it round, And I want to be a paperback writer, Paperback writer. If you really like it you can have the rights, It could make a million for you overnight, If you must return it you can send it here, But I need a break, And I want to be a paperback writer, Paperback writer