I chase the bright to mute the ache A sweet mistake I like to make I turn my sorrow into smoke Exhale it slow, then take another The mirror says I still look fine A flawless lie in ultraviolet I move like nothing ever hurt A perfect skirt of borrowed power But every laugh is sugar glass It shines, it cuts, it doesn't last So pour the night into my veins Let every bassline rinse my brain If I can't feel what I can't name Let noise become my little flame Neon anesthesia, kiss me clean Turn my panic into sheen Make me holy for the floor I don't want to know before Hands up, eyes closed, let it drown Love goes quiet, beat stays loud If the light can't make me whole Let it numb me, take control One more hit of a brighter blue One more night I won't feel you Count to four, then let it slide I'm alive when I'm denied The dancefloor's a pharmacy And I'm the patient and the thief I steal a pulse, I pay in sleep I keep my grief under my teeth The crowd is heat, my skin is ice I smile like that's a sacrifice Kindness feels like overtime Cold is champagne, crisp and kind But when the strobe lights stop their prayer There's only me, and vacant air I hear the quiet counting sins So turn it back on, pull me in I'm not chasing joy, I'm chasing less A softer head, a smaller mess If I stay numb, I won't collapse I won't look back, I won't relapse But every dose wears off in time And underneath, the dark is mine Neon anesthesia, kiss me clean Turn my panic into sheen Make me holy for the floor I don't want to know before Hands up, eyes closed, let it drown Love goes quiet, beat stays loud If the light can't make me whole Let it numb me, take control No cure, just color on the dark