Reliance

I was born upon this vessel with no destination in mind.
The captain helped me find my legs; he helped me find my 
rhyme.
I fell countless times, but he always helped me realign.
Until one day the wind blew through,
The deck shook and sent him into the blue.
I heard a roar, a splash, and just like that
His face was gone with all I knew.
I’m in a labyrinth with no lead!
Can this really be happening?

I need you to guide me further down the river -
My hands are shaking at the bow.
My fear was heightened by your passing -
I pray your lessons will pay off now.
Each word became a link in the chain.
When the Sirens call from the shoreline to follow,
It pulls me away over and over again.
Reliance, the word ringing in my ears,
My head is a canyon and it’s been echoing for years.
I depend on you like breathing - I can’t do it all alone.
When I’m sleeping who will ensure
That my lungs like the tide will swell and subside?
It’s involuntary and yet necessary
Until, finally, I can navigate on my own.

Courage isn’t something you can study; it’s something that 
you earn.
With someone there to hold your hand how can you ever 
learn?
When fear held me firmly in its grasp, I overcame and 
scared it back.
My fire singed it from my thoughts
And I screamed, “Is that all that you’ve got?”
I am here, waiting patiently for the pain you taunt.

I don’t need him to guide me further down the river -
My hands are steady at the bow.
My fear was heightened by his passing -
I know his lessons will pay off now.
I fight harder by myself.
I have never been more compelled.
I will steer this ship to the end of the earth -
It’s time to see just what my life is worth.
I will stare death in the face, defiant:
“Thanks to you I am no longer reliant.”