Down the road and over the hill
I took my baby riding in my automobile
As I'm riding along, me and my heart's desire
Pssht, a flat tire!

Well now I flattened my jack, I reached for my spare
A hole the size of Brooklyn - she was flat as a chair
I picked up my pump and started pumping back
Pssht, another flat!

Well I was standing there and lookin' thinking 'bout my fate
When along came Charlie in his eighty-eight
My baby jumped out and flagging Charlie down
He said: A'hop in babe; I'll drive you back to town

Well I was all shook up, and feeling bad
Just thinking about the fun that we could've had
I'd just about figured out what to do when
Pssht, pssht, the others blew!

Well now I picked up my jack and threw it across the field
I was so disgusted with my automobile
I made a sharp U-turn upon a single rim
'Cause Charlie had his girl and he had to catch him

Well I was gone and doing 'bout 82
When something said to me
Somebody's following you
I looked in my mirror, and bless my soul

It was the highway patrol!

Damn tire (hey hey)

Flat tire (hey hey)

Pssht, flat tire (hey hey)

I gotta get down on my knees in the road!

Flat tire (hey hey)

Beep beep, beep beep, beep beep!

Flat tire (hey hey)

Pssht, where's that jack?

Flat tire (hey hey)

Flat tire (hey hey)

Pssht, baby, I've got a job for you!

Flat tire (hey hey)

Beep beep, beep beep, beep beep!

Flat, pssht

Next time, I'm taking the bus!