There's questions we're always hearing every where we go
Like how do I cut a record or get on a country show
Well, it takes more than just ambition and three chords on
an old guitar
There's a few more things you ought to learn to be a
country star
You got to learn to sing like Waylon or pick like Jerry
Reed
Yodel like Jeannie Shepard, write songs like Tom T
Put a cry in your voice like Haggard, learn Spanish like
Johnny R
Whisper like Bill Anderson and you'll be a country star
Play piano like Ronnie Mil sap or Gilly or Jerry Lee
Yo-yo like Roy Acuff or talk plain like Ralph Emery
Growl like Conway Twitty, get a red, white and blue guitar
Build a swimming pool like Webb did and you'll be a country
star
Be tall like Sonny James is, tell jokes like Minnie Pearl
Or be short like Jimmy Dickens or play five-string like
Earl
Get a hip band like Willie, learn to stutter like M-Mel
Get a cap like Roy Clark wore or a voice like Barbara
Mandrel
Be rich like Eddy Arnold, say you're makin' more than you
are
Get a gimmick like Charley Pride got and you'll be a
country star
But if you have no talent and you're not a male
If you're built somewhat like Dolly or have a face like
Crystal Gayle
Come back stage and ask for Harold, Phil, Don or Lou
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