Em  A

Em                                                        A
He's a serious Mister shake his hand and he'll twist your arm
With monopoly money we'll be buying the funny farm
B                                             F#m                   A     
So I'll do flips and get paid in chips from a diamond as big as the Ritz
         E          B      A 
Then I'm calling it quits
         Calling it quits

Em                                        A
Eyes the color of candy lies to cover the handicap
Though your slippers are ruby you'll be led to the booby trap
B                                                           F#m         A
And there's no prize just a smaller size so I'm wearing the shoe til it fits

         E          B    A 
Then I'm calling it quits
         Calling it quits
B                                     A       G
Now he's numbering himself among the masterminds
Cause he's hit upon the leverage of valentines
B                                  F#
Lifting dialogue from Judy Collins storylines
      A    Asus2 A    Asus2     A    Asus2
Where get-tough girls turn into goldmines

Em A 

    Em                        G      Bm
But oh, those polaroid babies taking chances with rabies
F#m                 A    
Happy to tear me to bits
             E          B     A   
Well, I'm calling it quits
Yes, I'm calling it quits  3x
            Now he's numbering himself among the masterminds
            Cause he's hit upon the leverage of valentines