Sister Josephine

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Oh, Sister Josephine, what do all these policemen mean
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By coming to the convent in a grim limousine, after Sister Josephine?
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While you, Sister Josephine, you sit with your boots upon the altar screen
    Em               Am    D            D7      G
You smoke one last cigar - what a funny nun you are!
    Bm                               Em
The policemen say that Josephine's a burglar in disguise
Bm                                   Em
Big bad Norman, fifteen years on the run
    Bm                            Em
The Sisters disbelieve it no that can't be Josephine
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Just think about her tenderness towards the younger nuns.
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Oh, Sister Josephine, they're searching the chapel where you've been seen
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The nooks and the crannies of the nuns' canteen after Sister Josephine.
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While you Sister Josephine, you sip one farewell Benedictine
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Before your au revoir - a right funny nun you are!
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Admittedly her hands are big and hairy and embellished with a curious tattoo
  Bm                           Em
Admittedly her voice is on the deep side
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And she seems to shave more often than the other Sisters do.
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Oh, Sister Josephine, founder of the convent pontoon team
        Em                              Am
They're looking through your bundles of rare magazines
D     D7         G
After Sister Josephine.
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While you, Sister Josephine, you give a goodbye sniff of benzedrine
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To the convent budgerigar - a bloody funny nun you are!
   Bm                                      Em
No longer will her snores ring through the chapel during prayers
        Bm                              Em
Nor her lustful moaning fill the stille night
        Bm                               Em
No more empty bottles of altar wine come clunking from her cell
   Bm                              D    A7    Ddim D7
No longer will the cloister toilet seat stand up - right.
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Oh, Sister Josephine, slipping through their fingers like Vaseline
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Leaving them to clutch your empty crinoline, after Sister Josephine.
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While you Sister Josephine, sprinting through the suburbs when last seen
        Em                          Am
Dressed only in your wimple and your rosary
  D                   Eb   F  G
A right funny nun you seem to be.