Hey, Cartoon Boy, why do you look so sad ?
You know I hate to see you feelin' bad
I gave you everything that Archie had
Cartoon Boy
Well, do you think your life is such a drag
Because you thought you had it in the bag
When you were star of your own comic mag
Cartoon Boy ?

Well, are you happy now ? Your face is blue
I guess I know just what you're goin' through
And I can't help but think it's my fault, too
Cartoon Boy
You were created with a single line
But you developed nicely over time
Now I don't know what's yours and what is mine
Cartoon Boy

Hey, Cartoon Boy, you look a lot like me
You better check up on your family tree
'Cuz there's much better things for you to be
Cartoon Boy