True value, true thank you
For helping me dig this grave
Weaned on it, raised for it
Parents i scrimped and saved
Rough times for the rest
But lackey, we've got it made
Bed down in your movie, your life
Let the critics rave

I'm here to quell your fears
Done with your salad years
That's me the bitch around here

More useful now beaten down
Turn that frown upside down
I'm redeemed! Bitch of the year.

I hope god will forgive me
I think that he should
I've had dozens of chances
And I fuck up real good.

I wrote letters to jesus
And then to myself
I had high balls with santa
And sex with his elves

So much for salad days
I'm on the bitch parade. X4

**1st verse**

I was the rockstar that never got popular
You missed me
Cause I wasn't here

So goodbye to sex all day,
Binge drinking, special K
I'm sorry I thought that was clear

I had lunch with my boss
Who I'm plotting to kill
I would leer at his wife
but he's footing the bill

I'm the handsomest lamprey
With best sucking skill
I have leeches for friends
Here's to "keeping it real"

So much for salad days
I'm on the bitch parade. X2

Michael was spreading
The news of his wedding
And somebody else got a house.

so sing them a serenade
congrats boy you've got it made
I'm off this bitch parade now