I wrote a letter to the devil
And I sealed it in an envelope of fire
And when I got it back it burned up all my mail
Maybe next time I'll send him a wire

I am so important
That I'm talking to myself
And if I had a quarter
I might call someone who cares

So we know the moon revolves around the earth
And we know the earth is orbiting a star
We can tie a string to Saturn's ring and pull it from the sky
And collect the stars like fireflies and put them in a jar

I am so important
That I'm talking to myself
And if I had a quarter
I might call someone who cares

Aah, it's not so hard to sing this song
Aah, tell your ears to sing along

And when my television fell into the sea
I sat down and I wrote a little play
About the time my television fell into the ocean
And how I had to dive into the waters of the San Francisco bay