G            D
A man walks down the street,
       C          D
he says why am I soft in the middle now,
G         D
why am I soft in the middle,
C               D
the rest of my life is so hard,
G          D
I need a photo-opportunity,
C                   D
I want a shot at redemption,
G                      D
dont want to end up a cartoon,
    C          D
in a cartoon graveyard,
 G           D
bonedigger, bonedigger,
C             D
dogs in the moonlight,
G     D      C        D
far away my well-lit door,
     G          D
Mr. Beerbelly, Beerbelly,
 C                D
get these mutts away from me,
      G           D                C         D
you know I don't find this stuff amusing anymore.

G               D
If youll be my bodyguard
C              D    G    D    C D
I can be your long lost pal,
G               D
I can call you Betty,
     C              D
and Betty when you call me
         G          D C D
you can call me Al.

A man walks down the street,
he says why am I short of attention,
got a short little span of attention,
and wo my nights are so long,
wheres my wife and family,
what if I die here,
wholl be my role-model,
now that my role-model is
gone, gone,
he ducked back down the alley
with some roly-poly little bat-faced girl,
all along, along
there were incidents and accidents,
there were hints and allegations.

If youll be my bodyguard
I can be your long lost pal,
I can call you Betty,
and Betty when you call me
         G    D  C   D
you can call me Al,
        G   D C D
call me Al.