Let me tell you a tale for a penny
One that you can not hear anywhere else
Not anywhere else
I heard from a birdy it doesn’t end purdy
It doesn’t end well.
No it never ends well.

Let me spin you a yarn for a cent
Lord, would it not be a sin to deny yourselves a tale?
A penny, a penny, a penny for an old beggar-man’s story
A story. A penny for a tale.

There once was a doggy (woof woof woof)
She pranced in the moon with a mouthful of shiny red pennies
She lept and she wagged, so proud of her shiny red pennies
Leaping with glee

She trotted by the river (trot trot trot)
And oh, bless my soul, she saw her reflection in water
A pup with a jaw full of shiny red pennies
In water

She trotted as she plotted
To pirate these pennies - oh, how they teased

Lord, lord, that greed, it’ll kill you.
Lord, lord, go on, pass the hat, will you?
Your purse strings are tight. Bleed for a sinner
I just need a few pennies more! A few pennies more!

But greedy, so greedy (me me me)
She snarled as she swiped
And struck at the mud
At the water
A foolish pooch loots from herself in the wter
Her reflection struck back

Lord, I want to go onwith the song
But don’t make it bring up what she did to that pup
That cute little pup
I just might well up
But I’ll continue my rhyme for a dime
Or a penny is fine
These are difficult times
Yes, difficult times.
Thank you sir, you’re too kind

Lord, lord, that greed, it’ll kill you.
Lord, lord, go on, pass the hat, will ya?
Your purse strings are tight. Bleed for a sinner
I just need a few pennies more! A few pennies more!
Lord, lord, that greed, it’ll kill you.
Lord, lord, go on, pass the hat, will ya?
Your purse strings are tight. Bleed for a sinner
I just need a few pennies more! A few pennies more!
A few pennies more

And so did our doggie (bark bark bark)
She’d kill for a bite
Of those shiny red pennies
She left and she barked at the dog in the water
But her pennies, her pennies
THey dropped down, down
And after them, the shot
Down, down, down in the waters below!
God rest her soul.