They Calal Me Robert Petry and I Live in New Rochelle
With My Wife Laura and Son Richie But Now
My Life's a Living Hell Cause

Chorus
I Tripped Over the Ottoman
One Too Many Times
I Tripped Over the Ottoman
Until I Lost My Miiiiiiiiiind

I Was Head Writer For Alan Brady
Maybe You've Seen His Show
It's Now Funny and It Makes My Ears Bleed
This Week's Guest Star Isn't Danny Thomas
Our Special Guest Star Is Death!

Once I Laughed At Buddy's Jokes But
Now My Life's a Living Hell, 'cause...

Chorus

Marey Amsterdam Can Make a Sane Man Crazy
Morey Amsterdam Can Make a Nice Guy Kill
Morey Amsterdam Can Make a Sane Man Crazy
Morey Amsterdam Can Make a Nice Guy Kill

What Did You Bring Me Daddy?
What Did You Bring Me Daddy?
What Did You Bring Me Daddy?
Well, I Brought You Death!