the other day i got in a fight
it involved me and my foot in my mouth
and my wife
then i got thinking
wouldn't it be grand if with every word i said
my wish was the world's command

i'd be the king i'd be the top
i'd givemyself a raise, throw my own parade
number one, the chief, the boss
i'd be the king

no honey-do list
i'd rule
whatever i say is the way that it goes
that's be cool
and i'd go fishing
or watch sports on tv
and folks would carry me around
and i'd get to wear a crown
and i'd never spend a day on my feet

i'd be living large i'd be in charge
and the whole world would bow to me
i'd be the king

it happened again, i got in a fight
it involved me and my foot in my mouth
and my wife