C            G                F           C
I had a little cheeseburger, he was my only fiend.
  C               F                 G                C
I took him to the picture house and loved him to the end.
  C           G        F           C
I had a Venus-fly-trap on my windowsill
    C              F          G          C
and he ate all the flies that came in my room.


Chorus:
C            F           G     C
Please don't tread on my cheeseburger;
        C    F             G          C
he's my only friend in the whole vide vorld. 
C            F           G     C
Please don't tread on my cheeseburger
       C                F        G                C 
or I'd have to cut your head off with a blunt chainsaw.


I had a little doughnut, I ate him for my tea.
I put him in the microwave and burnt my mouth on the jam.
I stole a child's accordion and used it to do this
But then my father broke it and it damaged all his face.

Chorus:
Please don't tread on my cheeseburger;
he's my only friend in the whole vide vorld.
Please don't tread on my cheeseburger
or I'd have to wipe the remnants of the ketchup on your face.

Please don't tread on my Venus-fly-trap;
he's my only friend in the whole vide vorld.
He was little and green and he kept me safe from flies
until I forgot to water him and he died, which was very, very sad.

Chorus:
Please don't tread on my cheeseburger;
he's my only friend in the whole vide vorld.
How would you like it if I stole your television
and I gave it to a dummkopf in exchange for magic beans.
Please don't tread on my cheeseburger;

He's my only friend in the whole vide vorld.
Please don't tread on my cheeseburger;
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.
etc.

C  F  G  C
Oh oh oh oh
Good.