C  G      F  G
No beard, No good
         C        G              F        G
There's not enough beards in my neighbourhood
             C           G        F            G
And you can tell me you can't I know that you could
          C    G              F     C
You've got no beard and you're, no good

                C                     G
Well there's a beardless man in the flat next door
      F                     D                C
I've never spoken to him before and I never will
G                 F
until he grows a beard
               C                    G
and there's a beardless man in the flat below
     F                        D               C
I ignore him when he says hello and I always will
G                 F
Until he grows a beard
                  G
Until he grows a beard

 C  G      F  G
No beard, No good
         C        G              F        G
There's not enough beards in my neighbourhood
             C           G        F            G
And you can tell me you can't I know that you could
          C    G              F     C
You've got no beard and you're, no good

C   G
Well there's a beardless boy playing in the street
F   D   C
I pass him and I spit at his feet, it's his own fault
G   F
He should have had a beard
C   G
And there's a beardless girl I broke her heart
F   D   C
I also keyed her car, it's her own fault
G   F
She should have had a beard
G
She should have had a beard

 C  G      F  G
No beard, No good
         C        G              F        G
There's not enough beards in my neighbourhood
             C           G        F            G
And you can tell me you can't I know that you could
          C    G              F     C
You've got no beard and you're, no good

C   G
Well there's a beardless banker, he calls me on the phone
F   D   C
He asks me to pay back my loan, but I won't
G   F
Not until he grows a beard
C   G
And there's a beardless man, he calls me son
F   D   C
He asks me to dinner but I never come, and I won't
G   F
Not until he grows a beard
G
Until he grows a beard

 C  G      F  G
No beard, No good
         C        G              F        G
There's not enough beards in my neighbourhood
             C           G        F            G
And you can tell me you can't I know that you could
          C    G              F     C
You've got no beard and you're, no good