C                              G
The French drink wine, the English tea
    C                 G         C
The Yankee gulps his hot black coffee
    C                      G
The child drinks milk nine times a day
    C                 G       C
The Scotsman sips his whiskey toddy

[Verse 1]
    C                     G
You can keep you wine and keep your tea!
   C                 G         C
My curse on him that brings me coffee!
F                  G
I'll have porter, if I may
   C                G        C
It makes me feel content and happy

[Chorus]
C                          G
Porter quaffed down with a laugh
    C                 G      C
The gentry have their aching livers
C            C
Water is all right in tea
C                         G       C
For fish, and things that swim in rivers

[Verse 2]
    C                G
The poor man and the beggar, too
    C           G      C
The poet in the corner thinking
   F                      G
If they had money enough to spend
     C               G         C
It's pints of porter they'd be drinking

[Chorus]
C                   G
Porter quaffed down with a laugh
    C                 G      C
The gentry have their aching livers
C            G
Water is all right in tea
C                         G       C
For fish, and things that swim in rivers

[Verse 3]
    C                G
The miser hoards and stores his gold
    C                G      C
The bee collects the summer honey
F                 G
When that miser's dead and cold
C                 G        C
Someone else will kiss his money!

[Chorus]
C                   G
Porter quaffed down with a laugh
    C                 G      C
The gentry have their aching livers
C            G
Water is all right in tea
C                         G       C
For fish, and things that swim in rivers

[Verse 4]
C              G
Some go in for counting beads
C              G       C
More go in for chasing women
F                    G        C
The scholar stays at home and reads
C                      G      C
Give me the glass with porter in it

[Chorus]
C                   G
Porter quaffed down with a laugh
    C                 G      C
The gentry have their aching livers
C            G
Water is all right in tea
C                         G       C
For fish, and things that swim in rivers