We woke up one Sunday morning
Bought a thousand dollar van
Picked the boys up on the west side
Now I don't know where I am
But tonight would have gone way smoother had we had more beer

Buggered off to find a grocery store
Get a 40 and some gum
Feeling lonely got a girly mag
A little gloss to keep me warm
But tonight would have gone way smoother had we had more beer

Now Mikey's lost
Poor Tim is trapped in conversation
And Fil was saved
By all our constant aggravation

Hey there Bucky did you see that show?
Hey there Merch Face did you see?
We'll make sure to come this way again
We'll make sure you get in free
But tonight would have gone way smoother had we had more beer

I saw Gullage at the show last night
She said we played her favourite song
Some fat kid told me we saved his life
What the hell is going on
But tonight would have gone way smoother had we had more beer