When you made me a sandwich
I’ll admit I was quite pleased
Branston pickle
And a thick wedge of cheese
But the secret ingredient
The twist to yout recipe
Is now flooding through my veins
And you’ve decided to flee

I know we’ve fallen out
But I’m leaving you a note
Begging you to get in touch
‘Cos you’ve got the antidote
And if I called you a moron
Then I feel I was provoked
Please drop me a line
Because you’ve got the antidote

My hands are swollen
And my face is turning green
There’s a stabbing pain
In the region of my spleen
I’ve lost my hearing
And my sense of smell
Overall, I’d say I’m feeling
Rather unwell.