I know a girl who spent a year and a half crying
In the bottom of a bathtub, it was really such a bad look
Then on New Year's Eve, someone yelled: Ten, nine, eight
Everybody kissed, then she punched them in the face, woo

'Cause everybody's gotta find somebody
That's the point in every movie
You don't wanna end up like a sad spinster
Just wasting away, find yourself a mister
Yeah, that's what they say

That's what they say (aah-aah)
That sounds pretty shitty (aah-aah)
And i'm pretty, pretty (aah-aah)
Sexy in the city, save your pity, bitch
It's kinda fun just

Me and me, table for me and me
Hanging with me and me, finally free
Won't waste my life self-loathing
Happy I'm going home with me and me
I don't care, get out of my face if you don't like it

Asking for a friend
If I go twenty-seven years
With someone who treats me like shit
Instead of going out with my girls fuckin' L-I-V-I-N
Is it really such a sin? Is it really not a win?

'Cause I'd rather be dead
Than with ninety-nine percent of all men
When I'm with myself, it's honestly zen
Might as well be my girlfriend
It's kinda fun just

Me and me, table for me and me
Hanging with me and me, finally free
Won't waste my life self-loathing
Happy I'm going home with me and me
Me and me, table for me and me
Hanging with me and me, finally free
Won't waste my life self-loathing
Happy I'm going home with me and me

I don't care, get out of my face if you don't like it
I don't care, get out of my face if you don't like it