G
You're a slob, it's such a bore,
G                            D
Your underwear strewn on the floor.
D
And you're a packrat, most extreme,
D                    G
Our house is full of magazines.
G
The toilet's broke, and yet I bet,
G                           D
His majesty ain't fixed it yet.
D
You're one to talk, sleepyhead,
D                           C
And get your fat ass out of bed.

[Chorus]
C
Oh but in the eyes of god,
C                           G
We said our vows before the pews.
G                       D
"Not until death may we part"
D                            G
So until then I'm stuck with you.

[Verse 2]
G
You swore that you'd be true to me,
G            D
But gave me infidelity.
D
Why should I give a tinker's cuss?
D                                G
She was your sister, what's the fuss?
G
Well then, let's propose a truce.
G                                  D
What's good for gander is good for goose.
D
Hey now that's different, you took to bed,
D                           C
My favorite dog and all my friends!

[Chorus]
C
Oh but in the eyes of god,
C                           G
We said our vows before the pews.
G                       D
"Not until death may we part"
D
This is my curse, I said "I do."
D                              G
Better or worse I'm stuck with you.

[Verse 3]
G
You poked my eye, I wear a patch.
G                            D
I should've given you one to match.
D
Did you forget, you forgot me back?
D                                G
You chopped my thumb off with an axe.
G
You drowned my kittens one by one.
G                               D
You looked like you were having fun.
D
You stabbed my mother, in the chest
D              C
With a Korean bayonet!

[Chorus]
C
Oh but in the eyes of god,
C                           G
We said our vows before the pews.
G                       D
"Not until death may we part"
D
This is my curse, I said "I do."
D                                  G
Lest you die first I'm stuck with you.

[Verse 4]
G
And now I lie here in the grave.
G                         D
I pray to god my soul to save.
D
And in the darkness of the tomb,
D                          G
I'm glad I'm lying next to you.

G
And as I lay here 6 feet down
G                     D
My body buried under ground.
D
In this dank, and dreary cold,
D                      G
I'm just glad I'm not alone.

[Chorus]
C
Oh but in the eyes of god,
C                           G
We said our vows before the pews.
G                       D
"Not until death may we part"
D
I'm not sad I said, "I do."
D                                G
I'm just glad I was stuck with you.