The audience is rowdy and the rain is pourin' down
They want some Arlo Guthrie, I wanna get outta town
They're asking the impossible, there's just no way to make them see
And when I try to tell 'em, I hear them yellin' back at me

Christine Lavin could do it
Christine Lavin would win
She'd just come walkin' on the stage with her fancy clothes on
Sing a little, rap a little, twirl her baton
Christine Lavin could do it

I dreamed I went to heaven, I approached the Pearly gates
They looked all through my papers, said "There must be some mistake,
your name's not on the roster, you haven't passed your first exam".
I said "I been busy workin, I don't think you really understand".

And they said "Christine Lavin could do it
Christine Lavin got in
She just came walkin through the gates with her fancy clothes on
Sang a little rapped a little, twirled her baton
Christine Lavin could do it".