E
Keeper you've just made a decent save

So why d'you feel the need to rant and rave?
A
Screaming at defenders makes you look dead stupid
                                       E
Especially when they haven't done much wrong.
D      A         E
Please cease the trait.

Thank you to whoever found my purse

Also when I fell, the passing nurse
A
And when in my coma as I tried to bludgeon
                              E
Chartist demonstrators in the square.
D     A      E     D     A       E
Those on the ward, yours much restored.

I disagree entirely with your choice

Peetie Wheatstraw has a better voice
    A
I'd like to warn your readers; Stapeley Water Gardens
                                  E
A nice day out but best to take a flask.
D    A      E         D     A     E
Dear Miss McVeigh, it pains me to say
    D      A         E            D     A         E
The school choir was dull and the blame lies with you.

Sewage farm an absolute disgrace

Picnic table somewhat out of place
A
Leisure Centre cashpoint always out of order
                                     E
And there's too much chlorine in the pool.
D   A      E      D     A       E
Thirteen across - where was the clue?
D    A      E      D    A          E
Bird on the wire - Len, you're the dogs.