I see you for a minute,
It last me all the day,
But you are always with yourself
And never get away,

Chorus:
Fantastic man,
How can you stand being so fantastic, man.

Your eyes are orange,
Your hair is olive green,
You are the very tallest man
That I have ever seen,

(Chorus)

Your plastic Stetson
Sits on your hair,
About to lift its glory wings
And fly away somewhere.

(Chorus)

Your hair goes northward,
Your beard goes east and west,
The noble Jack of Diamonds
Is emblazoned on your vest,

(Chorus)

Your laugh comes rolling
On down the Avenue,
The rattle of the traffic
Simply can't compete with you.

(Chorus)

I'm pleased to see you,
I'm pleased to go,
I pass your corner
And I always say Hello,

(Chorus)

You are a wonder
That's wonderful to see,
I sometimes wonder
What do you think of me, Fantastic Man,
(spoken) How can you bear it?