Once upon a time there was a cotton-candy slut
Who would've been a beauty if she kept her mouth shut
Polyester princess gettin' pretty plenty play
Tore up from the floor up, man - and this is what she'd say:

"I'm so sexy, I'm so sorry
Bargain basement Mata Hari
My proportions epidemic
Just a bimbo with a gimmick."

Has a man she keeps on hand for when she needs a fix
Every time he kisses her he tastes like other chicks
That's all fine 'cause she don't mind it if he isn't true
Plenty more where he came from and they all want her too

She's so super, she's so swell
Cut-throat, cut-rate Jezebel
No one's drone, nobody's fool
Grows her own and owns her cool

Boys'll come and boys'll go - it doesn't bother her
Last names are a mystery and first names are a blur
Maybe when she's done with sin she'll settle down at last
Says: "Why they call it 'slow gin' when it works so damn fast?"

She's a starling, she's a swan
Discount whore of Babylon
Tear your heart out by the roots
Magdalene in go-go boots

Holy Mary pray for us
Holy Mary pray for us
Mata Hari pray for us
Mata Hari pray for us