I took my gal out on a date
I said, "Tonight let's stay out late"
"You wanna go uptown?"
"No, indeed"
The funky west side is just my speed
Funky west side, funky west side
Funky west side, funky west side

I took a job, I was driving a cab
Not too thrilling, very drab
Until one night this girl named Flo
Says, "Take me to the west side"
"Yeah, let's go!"
Funky west side, funky west side
Funky west side, funky west side

I don't know the north side, I confess
But the south side's kinda picturesque
The east side's very fine indeed
But the funky west side is just my speed
Funky west side, funky west side
Funky west side, funky west side

Well, Main Street is a torn up mess
Monroe Ave is so grotesque
Midtown Mall is fine, indeed
Funky west side is just my speed
Funky west side, funky west side
Funky west side, funky west side

So keep your Corn Hill and Southwedge too
Keep your phoney Park Avenue
They don't have anything I need
The funky west side is just my speed
Funky west side, funky west side
Funky west side, funky west side
Funky west side, funky west side
Funky west side, funky west side