"Hello Doris, I'm just about to dry my hair"
You got hair on your knees, you got hair on your arms
You got hair on your brow, you got hair on your palms
You got hair on your fingertips and when you're embalmed
You'll have hair on your kidneys, they'll be alarmed
Hairy man…
You're hairy when you're angry, you're hairy when you're calm
If you had a personality it would be a hairy charm
You're sitting in the freakshow like a monkey in the zoo
You're looking at them monkeys and they laugh at you
Hairy man…
You got a hairy passport, you're hairy through and through
You got a hairy garden the sky is hairy too
When you eat your food you got a hairy chew
And when you go to the toilet it's a hairy loo
Hairy man… hairy man… hairy man… what you gonna do?