I'm heartsick
And well rehearsed
Highly decorated
With a badge that reads
It could be worse
So prideful I choose
To live in disguise
With a levee set
For my heavy eyes

I apologize for the grief
When you'd refuse to eat
I didn't know
Just what to say
While watching you
Wither away
I'm homesick
And living in the past
Seemingly unfazed and
Strong if anyone asks
I'm keeping up appereances
With white lies
With a levee set
For my heavy eyes

I apologize for the grief
When you'd talk about belief
I didn't know
Just what to say
While watching you
Wither away

It was time this whole time
We can't undo or rewind

Just a simple conversation
About nothing much at all
Couldn't keep me in the room
I just kept walking
Down the hall
But now I understand
Just what a fool I'd been
No matter what the context
I won't have that time again
(And I live with that)

I took inventory
Of what I took for granted
And I ended up with more
Than I imagined
I've kept it bottled up and
To myself in the cellar
Kept for my ever changing
Mental health