You're a siren if there ever was one-
And there was one.
You're a Lorelei,
I'm a dope.
You're a baddie if I ever saw one-
And I've seen one.
Darling, you're a lie;
I've no hope.
I'm at the end of my rope.

REFRAIN 1

You are so fair-
Like an Oriental vision,
But you won't make that decision.
You're not quite fair.
I'd pay vour fare
To Niagara Falls and back too,
But you never will react to
This love affair.
You are the crepes suzette
I should get
On my bill of fare,
But if you love me not,
Flower pot,
See if I care.
See how you'll fare
If you keep on playing Rover.
When I come to think it over,
You're only fair.

REFRAIN 2

You are so fair
But you know you' re no Apollo
And to say you're hard to swallow
Is only fair.
I'd pay your fare
All around the world and back too,
For I'd like to give the sack to
This love affair.
You are the Camembert
I can't bear
On my bill of fare,
So if you love me not,
Flower pot,
See if I care.
See how you'll fare
If you keep on playing Rover.
When I come to think it over,
You're only fair.

REFRAIN 3
Your hair ain't fair
And you got no style in dressing.
I'm afraid you ain't possessing
No savoir-faire.
I'd pay your fare
To the tropic of New Guinea,
For I'd like to yell "C'est finis"
To this affair.
You are the freak event
In the tent
Of a county fair;
So if you love me not,
Polka dot,
See if I care.
See how you'll fare
If you keep on playing Rover.
When I come to think it over,
You're only fair.