G Bm Am D     G Bm Am D

[Verse 1]
G                                                      D
All lined up in a wedding group 'ere we are for a photograph
                                                         G
We're all dressed up in a morning suit all trying not to laugh
          A             D                 A              D
Since the early caveman in his fur took a trip to Gretna Green
        A                D              A              D
There's always been a photographer to record the 'appy scene

[Chorus]
G
'Old it flash bang wallop what a picture
D                     G
Click! What a picture what a photograph
C             G
Poor old soul blimey what a joke
A                  D
Hat blown off in a cloud of smoke
      G    D              G                       D
Clap 'ands stamp yer feet bangin' on the big bass drum
G              C              G                 C
What a picture what a picture rum tiddly um pum pum pum pum
D                         G
Stick it in your fam'ly album

G Bm Am D

[Verse 2]
G                                                    D
The same thing 'appened long ago when man was in his prime
                                                            G
And what went on we only know from the snaps he took at the time
     A                     D               A            D
When Adam and Eve in their birthday suit decided to get wed
   A                 D                   A                   D
As Adam was about to taste the fruit the man with the cam'ra said

[Chorus]
G
'Old it flash bang wallop what a picture
D                     G
Click! What a picture what a photograph
C            G
Poor old Eve there with nothing on
A                    D
Face all red and 'er fig leaf gone
      G    D              G                       D
Clap 'ands stamp yer feet bangin' on the big bass drum 
G              C              G                 C
What a picture what a picture rum tiddly um pum pum pum pum
D                         G
Stick it in your fam'ly album

[Key change up 1/2 tone]
G  D#

[Verse 3]
       G#                                             D#
You've read it in a folio or seen it in a Shakespeare play
                                                G#
How Juliet fell for Romeo in the merry month of May
    A#                D#              A#             D#
And as 'e climbed the orchard wall to reach 'is lady fair
A#                  D#                A#                    D#
As he tumbled she began to bawl as he travelled through the air

[Chorus]
G#
'Old it flash bang wallop what a picture
D#                    G#
Click! What a picture what a photograph
C#              G#
Poor young chap what a night 'e spent
A#                      D#
Tights all torn and 'is rapier bent
     G#    D#             G#                      D#
Clap 'ands stamp yer feet bangin' on the big bass drum
G#             C#             G#                C#
What a picture what a picture rum tiddly um pum pum pum pum
D#                        G#
Stick it in your fam'ly album

G#  Cm  Bm  D#

[Verse 4]
     G#                                                  D#
King 'Enry the Eighth had several wives including Anne Boleyn
                                                          G#
And he kept an album of their lives with all their photos in
   A#              D#                   A#               D#
As Anne Boleyn was on her knees dressed in her very best frock
     A#            D#                       A#                  D#
King 'Enry shouted smile dear please as 'er 'ead rolled off the block

[Chorus]
G#
'Old it flash bang wallop what a picture
D#                    G#
Click! What a picture what a photograph
C#              G#
Comes the print in a little while
A#                    D#
Lost 'er 'ead but she kept 'er smile
     G#    D#             G#                      D#
Clap 'ands stamp yer feet bangin' on the big bass drum
G#             C#             G#                C#
What a picture what a picture rum tiddly um pum pum pum pum
D#                        G#
Stick it in your fam'ly album

[Key change up 1/2 tone]
G#  E

[Verse 5]
     A                                                     E
When Napoleon married Josephine there was just the same to do
                                                             A
He galloped home from the battle scene all the way from Waterloo
    B               E                    B                 E
And as he came from orf 'is 'orse to the boudoir where she sat
    B              E                      B                      E
She said to 'im in French of course as he took of his big cocked 'at

[Chorus]
A
'Old it flash bang wallop what a picture
E                     A
Click! What a picture what a photograph
D             A
There she was with a big Hussar
B                    E
All caught up in 'er oo la la
     A     E              A                       E
Clap 'ands stamp yer feet bangin' on the big bass drum
A              D              A                 D
What a picture what a picture rum tiddly um pum pum pum pum
E                       E  A
Stick it in your fam'ly al-bum
A
Stick it in your fam'ly stick it in your fam'ly
A                                      E  A
Stick it in your fam'ly in your fam'ly al-bum