B                               A
There's a tramp sittin' on my doorstep 
F#                  E
Tryin to waste his time 
B                     A
with his mentholated sandwich 
F#                      E
He's a walking clothes line 
B                           A
And here comes the bishops daughter 
F#            E
On the other side 
B                      A
She looks a triffle jeolous 
F#                            E
She's been an outcast all her life 

                  F#
Me, I'm waiting so patiently 
A              B
Lying on the floor 
                          A
I'm just trying to do my jig-saw puzzle 
                    B
Before it rains anymore 

Oh the gangster looks so frightning 
with his luger in his hand 
when he gets home to his children 
he's a family man 
but when it comes to the nitty-gritty 
he can shove in his knife 
Yes he really looks quite religious 
He's been an outlaw all his life 

(chorus)

Oh the singer, he looks angry 
At being thrown to the lions 
And the bass player, he looks nervous 
About the girls outside 
And the drummer, he was shattered 
Trying to keep up time 
And the guitar players look damaged 
They've been outcasts all thier lives 

(chorus)

And as twenty thousand grandma's 
Waving thier hankies in the air 
All burning up their pensions 
And shouting, "It's not fair!" 
There's a regiment of soldiers 
Standing looking on 
And the queen is bravely shouting, 
"What the Hell is going on?" 

With a blood-curdling "tally-ho" 
She charged into the ranks 
And blessed all those grandma's who 
With their dying breaths screamed, "Thanks!" 

Me, I'm waiting so patiently 
With my woman on the floor 
We're just trying to do this jig-saw puzzle 
Before it rains anymore