C
i have mood swings so bad i am scared of going out
         F
go from happy to depressed in twenty minutes and i doubt that i can
        C
focus even function if i try to go to school
          F
when half my day is crying laying in a pool of my own drool
           C
i hate these days where im frustrated and upset and overwhelmed
           F
where i am happy then i hate myself and wish that i was dead
         C
then im excited go out thrifting and then as im walking home
      F
i feel so bad i feel like shit and i just wanna be alone
            C
tired of trying and slowly detaching
       F
then randomly smiling and feeling fantastic
      C
then laying in bed for an hour just staring
          F
then reading and cleaning and laughing and caring


[Chorus 2]
 C
i have mood swings so bad that i cant fathom i am real
    F
i have one too many feelings for just one person to feel
    C
im so tired i can barely keep my eyes open at best
    F
yet for 4 hours i lay awake not sleeping in my bed
     C
i spend my money oh so recklessly i dont have self control
      F
and then i feel so bad about it i just wanna stay at home
       C
my one big problem is that i have shit to do i cant just sleep
      F
the other is i am so energetic i cannot sit still
      C
frantically browsing the apps on my iphone
       F
lights my face up like an sos signal. “come home”
       C
i feel so alone but i just wanna fake it we’ll
   F
pretend i am happy till another moodswing makes it real
     C
and i eat until i almost puke, i smoke a pack of cigarettes a day,
        F
i pet my cat and i do laundry then my body is in pain, i wake up from my nap,
     C
another nightmare creeping to my brain, i get my stories straight,
     F
im ok if they ask, forget my meds and eating then i shower
        C
3 times in a row cus its nice to feel the fake warmth to pretend im not alone.
        F
laying on my body like a caring sillhoute, instead of a chalked up silver showerhead
        C
i am so lonely and so happy im alone
       F
i am so tired of my phone
      C
i am so worried bout my friends
      F
but are they worried bout me too?
     C
i am so scared that this is it
  F
then i feel patient as can be
     C
then i feel reckless and confused
     F
then i dont know what to do
       C
and the man strongly implied
   F
that i was faking being sick
    C
to somehow make music about something
     F
where i dont know shit
    C
and i was angry as i sat
    F
in my pjs on the counter
   C
in the late afternoon
  F
having skipped school and a coward
     C
told me to get therapy and get medicated well
       F
both are things i eat for breakfast
    C
both are things i need and hell
      F
i am doing what i can and surviving so you know
       C
i am singing bout my struggles
        F
cus theyre mine to sing about