Young Derrick would love to take my order
He works at the coffee place just up the street
He's happy and annoying with a smirk the size of Texas
He's my coffee enemy

Would you like a mochacino?
Or perhaps a cappucino?
Or maybe a frappucino?
Said Derrick wearing the chinos

All I really want is a cup of coffee
So strong the spoon stands up just a cup of coffee
All I really want is a cup of coffee
Give me a friggin' cup of coffee, Derrick

You should try out biscotti
Or a low-cal cabbage cookie
This muffin's only 3.50
And what's super great is that it's fat free

Don't wanna smell like an espresso
With your coffee scented soap
Maybe you should have some chai tea
Or maybe join me in some tai chi

All I really want is a cup of coffee
In a non-biodegradable cup just a cup of coffee
All I really want is a cup of coffee
Give me a friggin' cup of coffee

Oh Derrick why won't you listen to me
I don't want a magazine or a CD
I don't want a latte or a frappe
Just give me a coffee that doesn't taste crappe

All I really want is a cup of coffee (3X)
Give me a friggin' cup of coffee

All I really want (3X)
Give me a friggin' cup of coffee, Derrick